Monday, 11 July 2011

if i die before i wake

rare visit to the docs today.  i feel bloody awful,  i feel so dodgy that i even know how to spell diarrhea now.
had to give the doc a sample for testing, i know i said i could shit through the eye of a needle but i didnt mean my aim was good enough to give a sample in a tiny test tube sized pot.  
i should probably omit the gruesome detail but i'm bored from lying in bed all day so writing this gives me something to do inbetween sleeping and pooing.  have been bad since last wednesday/thursday but managed to go to work ok, things got worse this weekend though and now i have been installed with my own internal liquidizer, anyone for soup?  only second time i've been off work sick in over 10 years.

i've no idea whats wrong with me and don't think the doc was sure either so incase my prediction that i'll live forever doesn't work out and i kick the bucket here's some requests :-)
my favourite song is 'the hardest thing in the world' by the stone roses, play it at my funeral.
vegetarian buffet at the do afterwards please.
buried not burnt but don't go over the top on the coffin, something recycled would be good.
don't bother with a post mortem, if i'm dead i'm dead, don't want all my organs in plastic bags thanks.

nah seriously i'll be fine, i'll live forever don't you worry.
spent the day mostly in bed sleeping and kept myself amused watching 5 back to back episodes of angry boys, Bec thinks i'm secretly enjoying it but despite my sick sense of humour and watery jokes i would for once actually rather be at work if it meant i could be a bit less watery.

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